


Sidon's Adventures with a Cracked Out Blonde Elf Man

by CaridwenAngetueur1



Category: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Genre: Adventure, He's just too fond of his cracked out elf man, Link (Legend of Zelda) Uses Sign Language, M/M, Magic, Mute Link (Legend of Zelda), Selectively Mute Link (Legend of Zelda), Sidon is confused, Sidon is pining HARD dude, Sidon is tripping out man, Slow Burn, Video Game Mechanics
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-27
Updated: 2020-03-16
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:35:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,817
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21984532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaridwenAngetueur1/pseuds/CaridwenAngetueur1
Summary: Sidon vs Video Game Magic featuring the Hero of Hyrule who conveniently questions nothingI always wondered how video game mechanics would look like to other characters in the Zelda universe. This is a series of one-shots featuring exactly that.
Relationships: Link/Prince Sidon
Comments: 42
Kudos: 418





	1. Sidon vs Cooking

It took Sidon decades to teach himself how to cook. In his incredibly long lifespan, it was cooking that he found to be the one foe he couldn’t match. Usually, he treasured the small details, the rush of a challenge, but with cooking the details seemed to flurry out of control and time melted away before he could piece the flurry back together. After many years of taking classes under the best chefs in the Domain and learning the culinary arts from different traveling chefs who have stayed at the Domain, Prince Sidon liked to think he was a decent chef when he had the proper ingredients, time, and cutlery at his disposal.

When the Hero of Hyrule invited him on a small adventure, Sidon was amazed to discover the blonde’s talent with a campfire and small pot outstripped his cooking abilities by miles.

“How in the name of _Hylia_ did you cook dinner so quickly, dear Link?” Sidon gawked, having returned from setting up their bedrolls and supplies for the night to find that Link had managed to cook and dish up two plates of seafood curry. Sidon could have sworn he had taken less than 20 minutes total to set up their site, but the dish presented would have taken him at least an hour in order to properly cook all the items on the plates—speaking of which, where on _earth_ did Link find _plates?_

 _I just whipped it up real quick, figured you would want something to remind you of home as well as to keep you warm since there will be rain tonight_ , Link signed, setting down the plates gently to do so. Sidon stared, still trying to puzzle out how Link could have made and plated such an elaborate meal so quickly, before deciding that it would just have to be a question for another day.

“It amazes me how you can always anticipate what the will weather look like so accurately—is it your Sheikah slate that aids you?” Sidon asks conversationally before an idea strikes his mind—preservation! _Of course!_ Link must have found a way to preserve pre-made food, perhaps with the magic of the Sheikah slate? Sidon swore anything was possible with the curious little thing, he had never been able to make fins or tails of the thing.

 _Yeah, it has a sensor in it. It tells me the weather hour by hour unless the signal is disrupted by sandstorms_ , Link answers, taking a bite of his curry and eating with gusto. Sidon hesitates, aware of the fact that preservation usually involves a lot of rock salt—especially with seafood. He would have to take a swim to rehydrate, but it would be incredibly rude to reject food made for him. Resigned to the discomfort, Sidon took his first bite only to marvel at the taste.

He had never eaten anything like it, despite having made and eaten seafood curries before. The crab was familiar, despite his befuddlement that the Bright-Eye Crabs native to the Domain had blue shells and this crab had a reddish-orange. The other fish on the plate were foreign, some possessing a hard grayish shell with soft white meat, others curled up with tails that needed to be ripped off before being consumed. The curry powder mixed with rice worked to give everything a delightful kick—truly, it was the best meal he had ever had.

 _I think it needs a bit more flavor. Bit bland—or maybe I should add in rock salt? That shouldn’t affect the recipe any, right?_ , Link asked, eyebrow cocked and mouth still chewing as he thought. Sidon wondered how in the name of Hylia the other could be dissatisfied with the meal, but came to the conclusion that someone who was capable of cooking like this in so little time with so little supplies was probably capable of making, and was accustomed to, much better.

“Well, what’s in it already?” Sidon asked, determined to aid his dear friend nonetheless. He hoped the other would decide to remake the dish, just so he could watch and learn from the other. It would be interesting to witness, he thought.

 _Hearty Blueshell Snail, Goron Spice and Rice, so salt shouldn’t change it to anything else, right?_ , Link shoved the last bite of his meal in his mouth before setting the empty plate to the side, standing and pulling out ingredients from his Sheikah slate while Sidon sat staring at him in shock.

“That’s…that’s all?” Sidon was sure in any other case he would be embarrassed for how his princely demeanor slipped, but at the moment he was too shocked for his normal filter to kick in.

 _Yes? I didn’t have any porgy left so I used a snail instead, figured we’d both need the health boost anyway_ , Link started pulling out ingredients, setting the bag of rice and jar of Goron spice to the side and hunting through the slate to find another snail and one of the multitudes of shards of rock salt he had mined over his travels.

“But…but there’s crab here! And these strange other fish—how could you have made it with only a snail, rice and spices?” Sidon stood, shoving the last bite in his mouth and setting his own plate safely to the side to step over to the cooking pot. His confusion only grew as Link let out a triumphant noise and pulled out his last two ingredients; another Hearty Blueshell Snail and a piece of rock salt were added to the pile settled next to him before Link put the Sheikah slate away and picked the whole ensemble up in his tiny arms.

 _I have no clue how those end up there, they just sort of appear_ , Link signs, struggling to hold all the ingredients and not drop them. Sidon goes to grab the jar of spices before they slip out of Link’s hands, only for the Hylian to readjust to get a firmer grasp on it; _I just know that nobody else can touch the ingredients, or else it doesn’t work._

Deciding whether or not to focus on the fact that the food that Sidon just ate apparently just randomly _appears_ with no discernable source or the fact that Link has no clue how this magic occurs other than the fact that only he was capable of performing it was a monumental task, but Sidon had become accustomed to making big decisions in little time; “What doesn’t work? It’s a _cooking pot_ , it should work regardless of who handles the ingredients.” Sidon argues, only for Link to shrug and smirk.

 _Watch and see, then._ Link cracks a toothy grin that usually only accompanies a dangerous stunt, causing Sidon's stomach to drop to his feet and his thoughts to recall how he had yet to write out his will and that his last words ever spoken to his father would be the older man reminding him that he _really should_ get around to properly courting this Hylian that has surely drugged him if any sense of reality was involved in this situation, before chucking the ingredients half-haphazardly into the cooking pot.

Sidon winced, expecting to hear the shattering of glass, only for the sounds of clanking and sizzling to break the silence. He glanced down to see that a strange broth had appeared in the pot, the ingredients floating in it in a strange little circle with the occasional jostle and twirl. A cheerful tune filled the air with no source to cause it, sounding of clinking and sizzling and a cheerful little tune accompanied by Link's pleasant humming. With a poof of smoke and a magical sparkle, a perfect plate of seafood curry was presented in the center of an empty and clean pot, plated and all. Sidon's jaw dropped, yet Link only hummed and picked it up gingerly, popping a bite in his mouth and humming with delight.

 _Much better with the salt_ , he signed happily, flashing a thumbs-up before strolling back to where he was sitting and starting to eat.

Sidon’s eyes followed the Hero of Hyrule, not sure what he was supposed to feel. Was this magic? The Sheikah slate? A weirdly specific blessing from the goddess Hylia to aid Link in his travels…by making him able to magically create wonderful food without effort or even really the proper ingredients? Had Sidon _actually_ been drugged? Was it the snail? He had always brushed off Muzu's warnings of fermented snail slime being an addictive hallucinogenic, but maybe the old man had been correct after all? Would it be more shameful to die from snail slime overdose or from being stuck by a Lizalfos because he was too high to tell the difference between an enemy and his own tail fin? Sidon stared back at the cooking pot, before looking at Link and then looking back at where he set his plate to see that his empty plate was gone. There was absolutely no trace of it anywhere to be found, and with a quick glance, Sidon could see that Link’s first plate that had been emptied of curry had also gone missing and that the blonde swordsman seemed to not have a worry in the world about it.

Yes, he must have been drugged. He should have listened to Muzu more often, he was certainly going to find himself stuck in the ass by a Lizalfos spear with the state he must be in. What a shameful death this would be, he could hear the lectures he’d be met with by Mipha and his Mother in the afterlife already. If Sidon managed to survive this encounter with snail slime and whatever cracked-out adventure Link intended to have him accompany, the first thing he'd be doing when he returned to the Domain was an extensive detoxing diet and a campaign against drug use. 

Prince Sidon was a prince of rationality, however-as well as incredibly stubborn-and decided he would test out this magic cooking pot himself. Surely, while possible, the goddess Hylia wouldn’t waste her time giving the Hero such strange cooking magic, would she? This was either an elaborate drug trip or purely magic. With a determined nod, and the determination to reach a definite answer regarding exactly _how_ blitzed out high he had to be-and in the effort to determine how _fucked up_ he would be when he managed to come down-Sidon went off to the river to catch some fish and to snatch some salt from the river banks.

Following the logic that had created the seafood curry, this combination should create a salt grilled fish. Sidon was confident that when he tossed in the fish and salt, it would either cook and present itself as hypothesized or his cardiovascular system would collapse from the sheer amount of drugs he must have had slipped inside of his food. Perhaps snail slime didn't affect Hylians in the same way it clearly affected Zora? Or was the Hero of Hyrule a regular snail-slime junkie and nobody had realized? Would Sidon have to aid his dearest friend through recovery from drug addiction? Either way, the ordeal would most likely be ending in a heart attack and a decade-long lecture from his sister and mother on the dangers of drug use and trusting possibly-magic blonde elf-men with well-disguised drug addictions. With a resolute nod, and the opening lines to his anti-drug speech he'd be giving to all the youth at the schools back in the Domain in the off-chance he managed to survive, Sidon squatted in front of the cooking pot so that when he fell backward from heart failure he’d have less of a chance of head trauma and tossed in the fish and salt.

The salt clinked and a little bit broke off, and the fish made an unsettling slapping noise as it collided and stuck against the side of the pot before it began to sizzle a little from the heat of the pot, but otherwise, nothing else happened. No weird broth, no cooking sounds, no tossing and turning and swirling in a circle of the ingredients. Just a rather disappointing slick sound as the fish slid to the bottom of the pot and started to slowly cook. The smell of burning fish started to taint the air, and Sidon just stared down at it. The smell was absolutely awful but Sidon was pretty sure that at the moment he could have watched a Lynel parade around in a dress and shoot him in the ass with a shock arrow and he wouldn't have responded in the slightest. 

He glanced over at Link, who didn’t seem to notice his attempts at replicating the magical abilities the other possessed. Sidon then glanced back down at his rather pathetic fish and wondered if heart attacks really were this painless, or if perhaps the goddess Hylia really did have nothing better to do with her magic. Link glanced up from his meal with a frown, swallowing his last bite and signing for Sidon to see. 

_You're still hungry, Sidon? You should have told me, I could have cooked you something. Just give me a second, I can make you some salt grilled fish if that's what you want,_ the blonde Hylian pulled out the ingredients, picking out the burnt fish and ruined salt like the concept of heat was laughable and chucking them into the river before tossing in his own ingredients. Within seconds, a perfectly salt grilled fish was presented and the blonde Hylian was staring at Sidon with visible worry. 

_Are you alright, Sidon? Did the curry spice make you sick? I know it was a tad different from your normal palate-is your stomach upset?_ , Link questioned, and Sidon decided that even if this blonde man had drugged him that at least he was a decent enough cook to make up for it. He took a bite of the freshly-cooked food, the flavor dancing across his tongue-yup, definitely good enough to excuse being drugged. He let his signature smile break through his demeanor, grabbing Link's calloused hands in his own.

"I think so, my dear Link, but your cooking is absolutely exquisite, so I have no complaints." 

He'd have to work on that anti-snail slime speech while they were on the road tomorrow morning. 


	2. Sidon vs Stasis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short and fluffy, including a tickle fight of course.   
> Every suggestion you guys give is literal gold and I've written them all down to eventually do keep them coming.

It had been several days since the cooking ordeal. His anti-drug speech had been written out before finally being trashed when Link ran out of snails and Prince Sidon’s theory of an elongated drug trip fell to pieces. Accepting the fact that the Hero of Hyrule, who was capable of using every single weapon given to him with expert mastery and the bravery to rival a thousand men, also had the magical ability to toss random shit into a pot and make a meal fit for royalty was difficult, but Sidon prided himself on being adaptable at the very least. 

  
_There’s so bloody many of them_ , Link signed irritably as they both stared down at the massive bokoblin camp blocking their way through the canyon. If they were to go around they would have to backtrack for miles, hike up the mountains and then all the way back down. Not only did they not have enough supplies for Sidon to last through the cold of the mountains, but Sidon had never climbed a day in his life and would like to spend the rest of his days never having to do so. And honestly, the decision had been made the second the Hylian had laid eyes on the glowing purple chest on a platform above the camp, surrounded by multiple other wooden chests. 

  
“Would it be possible for us to ambush them? I see red barrels, we could set a few off and deal with the rest by hand?” Sidon offered, seeing it as the only manageable option that would be guaranteed to lessen some of their numbers and keep the smaller Hylian out of danger for as long as possible. Sidon’s first aid knowledge was patchy at best.

The blonde shook his head, pulling out his Sheikah slate and peering upwards at the cliffs before a gleeful grin broke over his face. _Nope, better idea—stay right here._ Link took off, scaling the cliff face as easily as there had been a ladder instead of sheer rock. Sidon tried to find what could have inspired such an action before his keen eyes landed on a massive boulder perched on the cliff right above the bokoblin camp. He could instantly picture the plan—with a simple push, the rock would fall, set off all the barrels and send the camp into flaming chaos. The only problem was the boulder looked _huge_ —about as tall as Sidon and just as wide. It was possible that Sidon himself would not be able to push it alone. How would Link manage?

Link reached the top, flashing a thumbs up to Sidon before lifting his Sheikah slate to face the rock. A yellow light flashed, followed by a chain attaching itself to the boulder and the whole object turning bright yellow. Sidon watched in confusion as the hylian pulled out a sledgehammer and hit the boulder, an arrow appearing pointing outward and growing larger and redder with every hit. The chain broke, and inexplicably the boulder shot from its spot and landed perfectly on the barrels, blowing the entire camp to kingdom come. 

  
The explosion was glorious in a way that only the Hero of Hyrule could manage—screaming bokoblins blew past Sidon’s frozen-stiff body as he watched the boulder keep going as if it had been launched by a giant of his father’s stature and not by a little hylian elf-man of an absolutely _minuscule_ 5’4. The last bokoblin left was a little red one that hobbled around dazed and confused as it took in the destruction of its home—which had taken less than 30 seconds in the grand scheme of things. It was almost pitiful when it turned its gaze on Sidon, let out a bellowing war cry and snatched up a half-burnt club off the ground. 

  
It gave a valiant leap, and for a second Sidon could see into its eyes. There was nothing but pain, anguish and the thirst for vengeance in those piggish eyes. Sidon wondered how often the eyes of those he knew held the same look. He started to reach for his sword that sat idle on his hip, an apology on his lips for the robbery of life in relative peace, before the bokoblin froze in mid-air, flashing a bright yellow. 

  
Huh. Now that he got a longer look at it, its lolling tongue and snotty face looked absolutely stupid. So much for profound thoughts. 

  
Link came barreling down onto the back of the poor thing, sword down and piercing straight through like the bokoblin was simply a piece of meat to stick on a skewer and roast over a fire. If he had not already lost all sensitivity to blood and gore, Sidon was sure the sound of the spleen cracking and the splatter of guts on the ground at his feet would have upset his stomach. The timer ran out, now that it was closer Sidon could hear an odd sound emanating from the bokoblin’s body before it spasmed and let out a scream before poofing into smoke and leaving only its remains.

  
_That was fun!_ Link signed, pulling his sword out of the mess of left-behind guts and scooping them up and into his pockets. Sidon suppressed his shudder, glad he had no pockets for the other to request he carry things with. 

  
“Truly. Um, Link? What in _Hyrule_ was that?” 

  
He was presented with the mysterious Sheikah slate—he still was wary of the thing—and was shown a highlighted icon of a lock with a plus next to it. _It’s the Stasis Rune, picked it up on the Great Plateau when I woke up and upgraded it when I had three cores. Pain in the ass to upgrade, but so worth it when I’m in a pinch, don’t you think?_ Link’s signing was bored as if this information was something that could be found in a common library book. With a quiet nod, Sidon simply handed the slate back. 

  
“So…what exactly does it do?” Link glanced over, an excited look on his face before he held it up to Sidon and pressed a button. 

  
A cold feeling instantly overcame him with the connection of the yellow chain, the ringing of the timer instantly filling his senses and his body numb to the quick pokes to his abdomen that the Hero of Hyrule was joyfully giving him. He could feel something building in his core, and when the timer ran out he was subject to what felt like an onslaught of tiny-Hylian pokes to his sensitive stomach. Sidon couldn’t help but burst out into joyous laughter as he was tickled half-to-death, and the blonde laughed along with him before taking off. 

  
“Don’t you run from me!” Sidon wheezed, on his knees in an attempt to get his breath back. He pulled himself back up, taking off after the other with his arms outstretched to nab the nimble little thing. By the time he finally managed to catch the blonde to return the favor, the mysticism of the Stasis rune melted into the general weirdness that was the rest of the day. 


	3. Sidon vs Eating

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Woo chile, this a short one. 
> 
> But, like, anymore eldritch-horror themed ideas from ya'll? There's gotta be some downright creepy/terrifying things LInk does in-game that I can't think of.

Sidon had known beforehand that the Hero of Hyrule was…uniquely ravenous. It had been a legend when he was a child that the blonde man could out eat anything in the entirety of Hyrule, be it the formidable Gorons or any number of half-feral Zora (that had been an interesting year, according to his father). He had not believed it, especially when he saw the man and his minuscule height. But apparently the immense amount of food the other could eat was only one half of the legend—no, the truly remarkable part was how _quickly_ the other could eat. 

Prince Sidon used to think his own appetite was difficult. He ate more than his father, believe it or not. His worries of gaining weight were constantly assuaged by the many elders of the kingdom who loved to remind him that he was still a young and growing boy. Even then, he knew that the periods of time before his growth spurts were primarily taxing on the kitchens. 

But Link? He swiftly learned that the tiny blonde had him _spectacularly_ outmatched. 

...

  
_I’m hungrier than a fucking Hinox_ , Link smiled brightly at Sidon, the blonde covered head to toe in dirt, grime, and mud. It reminded the Prince of being a young child after a day of playing in the muddy Domain only to come back to the palace absolutely covered from the conquests of the day. He himself was also dirty, but not to the extreme degree of the other. For a hero he had thought so dignified, it had been an odd (and frankly relieving) revelation to watch the blonde rooting through anything and everything no matter how dirty. 

“I saw a river nearby, do you want me to go hunting?” Sidon offered, hoping the other said yes. The grime of the day had worked its way between his scales, and he _desperately_ wanted to go clean off and cool down. Link opened up his Sheikah Slate and peered at the contents before nodding. 

_Yeah, I’ll join you. Just let me eat real quick and we can set out._

Sidon really wanted to argue. He _really_ wanted to, even if it made him seem like an utter child in front of the Hero of Hyrule. He was dirty and gross and goddammit he wanted a bath. He was very impatient, a trait he had been working on but admittedly had made very little progress on. 

“Are you sure? I’d hate to rush you, I can just go ahead and get a head start…” Sidon barely managed to keep the pleading edge out of his voice, watching as the Hylian started unloading food from the slate. It was a lot of fruit—only apples, which Sidon vaguely remembered the blonde always carried upwards of two or three hundred on his person at all times for various reasons, namely that his horses loved them and they made quick and easy snacks. 

_No, literally just give me a second. I just need 20 apples to restore me back to full health it’ll take, like, 3 seconds. Time me._ Link gave the Prince a bright smile as he picked up the first apple and held it up for Sidon to see. Sidon let out a fond sigh, feeling himself settle at the sight of that blinding and silly smile. The other man was just so talented at calming Sidon down, no matter his impatience and temper. 

“Alright, but don’t eat _too_ quick, my dear friend, I don’t want you to have an upset stoma—” 

Sidon’s eyes widened in abject horror as Link’s mouth opened and popped in the apple whole, core, stem and all. The blonde didn’t halt for a second before reaching down and grabbing the next, popping it in like it was air and chewing once as if air was all it actually was. There was no mess like you would think there would be from something so… _horrifying_ , just a blindingly-fast chewing motion as apples were nonchalantly popped into his maw like honey candy. 

As quickly as Link had started, he was also finished. All 20 apples were gone as if obliterated by a Guardian’s beam, disappeared into the endless void that was the other’s stomach. Sidon was unsure of the emotion that he was currently feeling, but it felt like a mixture of horror and awe. Link let out an adorable sigh, patting his stomach and shooting Sidon a smile brighter than the sun. 

_Let’s go catch some fish! I’ll probably snag some more apples along the way, but we can probably set up camp on the riverbank since there are no Bokoblin camps in this area._ Link signed, grabbing his Sheikah Slate and pulling out a simple sword to have strapped to his hip as they walked. Numbly, Sidon picked his metaphorical jaw off the floor and followed after him. 

It really was just easier to… _not question_ some of the things he saw. He had a feeling that this would not be the strangest, or even most horrific, thing he saw on this journey. 

_Do you think we could snag some snails while we’re there, too? My supply is running low._ Link shot Sidon a questioning glance at the look of pure concern in the Prince’s eyes. 

“…Yes, my dear friend. I’m sure we can. I would ask that we not have any for dinner tonight, however. My appetite is very…lacking.” Sidon sighed, eyes instead refocusing on the river ahead. 


	4. Sidon vs Bombs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Link says yeet

Sidon, being the Prince of the Zora, has grown up with and mastered the delicate art of fishing. It was an elegant dance between Zora and fish, two beings so close to each other as to be almost family, and yet one must hunt the other. It is a story of survival, or sacrifice and respect. It was a dance that Prince Sidon knew in his very soul, and he had always been a beautiful dancer. 

It was this dance now that he was in the midst of performing, twirling through the water searching for the perfect host of partners. There was never just one or two partners, no there had to be many in order to satiate the Zora. He was a fearsome partner, however, and many ran from him. But that was the nature of the dance—the pursuit. 

His eyes narrowed down on the perfect school—a school of Armored Carp, elegantly moving against the current of the river. His powerful legs kicked, bringing him alongside. He twirled, arms pushing the water to follow his movements as he pleased in order to guide the fish closer. His partners danced with him, trying to escape from the water flow he had trapped them in against the current. 

It was the beautiful dance of life and death, and Sidon was a master. He reached out, preparing to snag the fish and hook them to his hip guard when a blue orb landed in the water. It took a second before Sidon heard the ticking and jerked, diving straight down and barely avoiding the blast zone. The blast pushed him further down to the riverbed, holding him there for a still moment before the rush of water filling the displacement ripped him from the bottom. The current caught his twisting and jerking as Sidon tried to right himself, carrying him downstream until he managed to pick out which direction was up and which was down. 

He broke the surface with an angry snarl, turning to see that Link was struggling to climb back up an ice pillar erected in the center of the river. Sidon let out a sigh as he watched the Hylian struggle and slip, a cursory glance telling him that the Hylian had caught more than his fair share of fish. It was more than likely that the Hylian had not seen him and had…tossed that orb? What _was_ that? 

Prince Sidon was torn from his thoughts when the sound of a high-pitched yelp and the splashing of water broke the air. With a shake of his head and the resolve to question it once the other was safe and out of the fast water, Sidon dove underneath the surface and swam against the current. It was barely a deterrent for someone of his size and musculature, but he could only imagine how difficult it would be for somebody of Link’s size to swim in such a strong current. The thought of the other being dragged helplessly to the bottom of the river spurned Sidon on to kick just a little faster. 

He made it just in time to catch Link before he fell in again, scrambling desperately at the ice only to lose his grip. Sidon felt rain on his dorsal fin, looking up to see a storm had begun to brew. No wonder his usually-nimble friend was struggling so. With a single large palm, Sidon held Link up by the butt and hoisted him up enough for the other to grab the ledge. 

_Hey! Thanks, Sidon!_ Link shot him a relieved smile, nose and ears tinted red from the cold river water and the ice. Sidon could feel the spots on his fins glow with a flush, momentarily forgetting why he had been so annoyed with the other. 

“Ahem…yes, no worries my dear friend,” Sidon coughed, turning around to collect himself and to remember why he had been aggravated in the first place; “Ah, yes! Link, what in Hyrule was that blue orb! It blasted me halfway downstream!” Sidon swung back around, only to catch Link brandishing another one. The blonde gave him a questioning glance before glancing upwards and gesturing with the sphere in his palms. 

“Yes! That! What is that?” Sidon exclaimed, using the claws on his fingers to dig into the ice block and hoist himself up to the ice ledge so that he could assist the blonde if he happened to fall in again. It was difficult holding on, given the ice burned against his skin and it was rather awkward only having his lower waist submerged in the water. 

Link grunted, hitting a button on the Sheikah Slate that made the sphere disappear into thin air. 

_It’s a bomb, one of two. I didn’t realize you were under that group of Armored Carp. Are you hurt?_ Link looked worried, already scrolling through the slate for what Sidon assumed (read: dearly hoped) were healing potions. 

Sidon let out a huff because of _course_ it was impossible to stay upset with the other for longer than 10 seconds: “No, my dear friend, I am perfectly alright. I was just…very surprised. I was not expecting it. Why did you throw it into the water?” 

Link let out a loud giggle with that question, a sound that had Sidon riveted to the spot with its bright cheerfulness. _I use it to fish! I can’t swim as long as you do, so it’s easier for me to blow up the fish and then dive in to catch them. Like this!_

The blonde quickly pulled out another one of those spheres, lobbing it halfway down the river towards a school a Hyrule Bass before clicking a button on the slate. A blue explosion rocked the waters, igniting the air around it for a moment before disappearing in a loud explosion. Sidon winced, nearly losing his grip on the ice block before Link took a running jump over his head, his paraglider out before diving into the water. The current carried Link the rest of the way to the now-dead fish—how were those fish not blown up to pieces? Sidon almost didn’t want to know—and the blonde turned to wave at him as he struggled to tread water. 

Sidon felt his hearts skip a beat when the blonde slipped under the water. He was there holding the other up before he even realized he had sprung from the ice block, holding the blonde out of the water and tight to his chest and furiously hammering the flat of his palm between the other’s shoulder blades to ensure the other coughed the river water from his lungs. 

“Link! Breathe, my friend! Why in the name of _Hylia_ did you jump if you were not ready to tread against the current? You would have drowned if I had not reached you!” Sidon scolded, quickly snagging the fish that attempted to float past them while he held the still coughing blonde in his arms. If the blonde deemed these fish worth nearly sacrificing the fate of all of Hyrule for, they better _damn_ well taste worthy of the Goddess’s plate. 

The blonde tapped his arm, and Sidon shifted so the other could lift his hands to properly speak: _Not a big deal. Damn woman won’t let me drown either way. Plus_ , the blonde gave him a wise-cracking smile that Sidon could already tell would exasperate him before the other even continued to speak, _I knew you’d come and save my sorry ass_. 

Sidon huffed, turning away so that the other couldn’t get a front-row seat to his flushed features and glowing spots. It would do no good to let such a mischievous creature know how flustered he managed to make the Prince on the daily, lest his overwhelming fondness is used against him. 

“Yes, well, these fish better be damn delicious.” 

**Author's Note:**

> So I'm back from the dead. Fully Warning Ya'll: Updates will be slow and probably short. I barely have time to write and that is that. I also haven't written in a long time, so I'm considering this practice to get back into it so I can start writing longer stories again--I have a certain rewrite for a long-dead story I'm planning to do. Please be patient with me.  
> If you have any suggestions, please write them in the comments!


End file.
